Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
Randomize