i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
