i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
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