My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Panties = found
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Randomize
