So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
i am craving dick and cupcakes
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
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