I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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