Fine. I'll sleep in my office
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
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