You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
Randomize
