is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
Randomize
