whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
Randomize