I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
and then I told her I was too drunk. She started to cry, and told me this always happens to her and that she thinks shes ugly. I pretended I was asleep and then she farted.
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
He casually compared computer science to childbirth and I was like "hey, as someone who has wanted to fuck you for six months now, could you please never talk about childbirth ever again"
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
Randomize
