She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
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