We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
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