Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
