Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo
With himself
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
Randomize
