Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize