i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
Randomize
