Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize
