school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize
