is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
Just 30 Funny Tumblr Posts About Starbucks
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
18 People Are Kind Of A**holes But Also Completely Hilarious
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.