i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
Randomize
