dude i'm inner monologue high
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
Randomize
