Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
i think i have herpe
just one?
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
