And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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