You're completely useless in the revolution.
Where is the hickey?
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
So I called her out for all the gossip she does and she's like "you do the same, bitch"
So I was like "Im classy like the Countess, youre just a bitch like Kim."
Kudos on the Interstate Housewife metaphor.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
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