Those balls look pretty dangerous.
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
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