i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Randomize
