Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
Just drug him and when he wakes up say "You just woke up from a coma, we've been married for 5 years." It'll be like The Vow but fucked up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
Randomize