i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
Randomize