didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
We need to rekindle our bromance
time to smoke my breakfast
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
Randomize
