A little boy walked by his parents room one night, looked through the keyhole, and said "and that bitch tells me to stop sucking my thumb!"
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
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