I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
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