Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
After tacos, we're chasing women.
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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