paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
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