And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
Randomize
