4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
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