So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize