I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
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