escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
i want to swaddle you in tequila
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail