Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
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