i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Randomize
