Come home. Im drunk and cutting my own hair. This is bad, i need you.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
