Umm I'm too high to move.
i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
Randomize
