Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
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