I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
