NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
Randomize