we're blogging at a bar
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.