I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
I want to fling myself into the sun
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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