ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
