break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
